Controlled by Love: Living Differently in a Broken World

Paul spends a great deal of time in Ephesians chapter 4—and continuing into chapter 5—teaching believers how to live. He makes it unmistakably clear that those who follow Christ should live differently. Why? Because the life of a believer is meant to reflect the love of Christ.

“Your life must be controlled by love, just as Christ loved us and gave his life for us as a sweet-smelling offering and sacrifice that pleases God.”
— Ephesians 5:2 (GNT)

When love controls our lives, it changes everything about how we act, speak, and interact with others. It’s not something that can be hidden. The evidence should be so visible that even non-believers recognize something different in us. Imagine if the world looked at Christians and immediately saw the character of Christ—if governments, communities, and workplaces saw us as the ones who bring peace, honesty, and hope.

Yet, tragically, Christians are often misunderstood or even persecuted. Still, Paul reminds us that love must remain the foundation of our lives. When we are controlled by love, these qualities naturally flow from us:

• We forgive.

• We are not easily offended.

• We love our enemies.

• We show mercy.

• We are peacemakers.

• We maintain a good reputation.

• We speak with grace.

• We produce good fruit.

• We are honest business owners and wise managers.

• We engage in our communities.

• We pay our taxes.

• We raise godly children.

• We lead with integrity.

These are not just moral guidelines—they are signs of a life transformed by love.

But Paul also gives a clear warning about the things that should have no place among God’s people:

“Since you are God's people, it is not right that any matters of sexual immorality or indecency or greed should even be mentioned among you. Nor is it fitting for you to use language which is obscene, profane, or vulgar. Rather you should give thanks to God.”
— Ephesians 5:3–4 (GNT)

The world today is drowning in sexual immorality, indecency, and greed. Pornography, promiscuity, the distortion of gender and sexuality, and the exploitation of children all point to a society far from God. Indecency—the rejection of moral and upright living—has become normalized.

And greed, at the root of much of this, is simply idolatry in disguise. Pride says, “I am.” Greed adds, “Therefore, I must have.”

Paul does not mince words:

“You may be sure that no one who is immoral, indecent, or greedy (for greed is a form of idolatry) will ever receive a share in the Kingdom of Christ and of God.”
— Ephesians 5:5 (GNT)

The call is clear. If we belong to Christ, we must let His love control every part of our lives—our actions, our words, and even our desires. To live differently is not a burden; it’s a privilege. It’s how the fragrance of Christ spreads in a world desperate for the real thing.

All The Fullness of God

“...and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God.” — Ephesians 3:19 (ESV)

To know the love of Christ is not merely to understand it intellectually—it’s to experience it so deeply that it changes the capacity of your heart. When you grasp how wide, long, high, and deep His love truly is, something happens inside of you. You are enlarged on the inside—made able to receive and contain more of God Himself.

Think about that: to be filled with all the fullness of God. What if our lives truly operated from that fullness within us? How different would our days look if we lived fully aware of His power, presence, and love working from the inside out?

This thought leads us directly to the next verse:
“Now to Him Who, by the power that is at work within us, is able to do superabundantly, far over and above all that we dare ask or think…” — Ephesians 3:20 (AMPC)

That power within us—the Holy Spirit—flows from the foundation of knowing the love of Christ. The more we understand His love, the more room we give His power to move through us.

When I was a young man, I often doubted my future. Would my dreams ever come true? Would I marry, write, or produce films? Fear and discouragement boxed me in—until one day my uncle gave me a sermon by Joel Osteen on this very verse. As I listened, faith sparked inside me. I began to believe again that my dreams mattered because God loved me.

The revelation of Christ’s love isn’t just comforting—it’s transforming. When you know His love, you live from fullness, not emptiness. And that changes everything.

Rooted and Grounded on the Love of Christ

Rooted, Grounded, and Filled with Love

The Bible calls us to be “rooted and grounded” (Ephesians 3:17). Just as no tree grows tall without deep roots and no building stands without a firm foundation, our faith cannot thrive unless it is anchored in Christ, our bedrock.

Jesus said:

“Everyone who hears these words of mine and does them will be like a wise man who built his house on the rock… and it did not fall, because it had been founded on the rock.”
— Matthew 7:24–25, ESV

Both the wise and foolish builders faced storms, but only the one on the rock stood firm. Sand shifts and conforms; the Rock—Christ—remains unmovable.

Paul also warns, “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind” (Romans 12:2). The world’s shifting ideas are like sand, but Christ never changes.

Paul’s prayer in Ephesians 3:18-19 reveals another dimension:

“That you may have strength to comprehend… what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ… that you may be filled with all the fullness of God.”

Knowing Christ’s love is like turning a flat square into a solid cube. In Euclid’s Elements, a solid is defined as that which has “length, breadth, and depth.” Love gives our lives volume, depth, and purpose.

The love of Christ transforms a blueprint into a living structure God can use. It moves us from passive to active: husbands love sacrificially, workers serve with excellence, leaders guide with vision.

As John Maxwell says, “We are people of value who add value to people of value.”

Rooted in Christ and filled with His love, we can stand strong, weather the storms, and live out our purpose for His glory.

5 Ways to be Incandescent: Becoming Incandescent for Christ

Something is awe-inspiring about a glowing filament inside an old incandescent bulb. It doesn’t shine because it’s merely present—it glows because it’s heated to the point of radiance. As followers of Christ, we are called to be like that glowing filament—heated by the fire of God’s Spirit until we emit the light of the Gospel to the world around us.

Becoming Incandescent for Christ

Jesus said in Matthew 5:14-16 (NIV), “You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden… let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.”

Jesus said in Matthew 5:14-16 (NIV), “You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden… let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.” We are not meant to blend into the darkness but to shine so brightly that others are drawn to the hope we carry.

1. Heated by His Presence

A bulb without power is cold and dark. Likewise, a believer without the presence of God is lifeless. We are heated—set aflame—when we draw near to Christ through prayer, worship, and time in His Word. As Jeremiah 20:9 declares, “His word is in my heart like a fire, a fire shut up in my bones.” The closer we are to the Lord, the hotter our passion becomes.

2. On Fire for the Lord

To be incandescent is to burn with purpose. Passion for God is not just emotional fervor; it’s a steady, persistent flame that fuels obedience and devotion. Paul urges in Romans 12:11 (NIV): “Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord.” A believer’s zeal is contagious—our passion can spark others to seek Christ with the same intensity.

3. Radiating the Gospel

Heat transforms into light. When our hearts are aflame for the Lord, that inner fire radiates outward. Our words, attitudes, and actions shine the love and truth of Jesus. It’s not about drawing attention to ourselves but pointing people toward the One who saved us. As we share our testimony, serve with kindness, and love sacrificially, we become living witnesses to the power of the Gospel.

4. A Passion for Others

Incandescence is not for our benefit alone. The world needs the warmth and light of Christ. We are called to love our neighbors, to be compassionate toward the hurting, and to share the hope that is in us. The hotter our hearts burn for God, the more our lives naturally glow with mercy, generosity, and grace.

5. Staying Lit in a Dark World

The darker the room, the more a single flame stands out. Today’s world can feel heavy with confusion and despair, but that’s exactly when the light of Christ within us must shine brighter. To keep burning, we must stay connected to the source—through fellowship with other believers, steadfast prayer, and reliance on the Holy Spirit.

A Call to Shine

An incandescent Christian doesn’t hide their light; they shine with the warmth of God’s love and the brilliance of His truth. Let’s allow the fire of His presence to heat our hearts until we glow with a holy passion—illuminating homes, workplaces, communities, and even the darkest corners of the earth.